Fartmoodles: Chapter 11

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
Chapter 11
"That's what we call broke."
Edit 1
By: Nellie Tobey

Notes:
I really had no idea what I was going to do with these characters, and any time I start writing I just kinda decide.  What thing will they do for this part?  Originally the concept was to create something my nephew could enjoy and have some teachable moments for current social situations.  But honestly it all started because I thought something with farts and magical creatures would be something he'd really enjoy.


  Steve and Minister watched with anticipation as the child called 'Cass' kept trying to convince the sibling 'Madison' that there was something in it's hands.
Madison, with rolling eyes said again, "You aren't fooling me Cass. You're just gonna ask me to pull your finger or something silly."
  Cass with slumped shoulders stomped over to the bottom bunkbed to sulk while still holding Tooty tightly.  "Are you going to disappear if I let you go fairy?"
  Tooty tried not to be offended, and shouted 'NO', as she shook her head.  It felt like the child was starting to hear her.  At least it was starting to communicate with her in some way.
  Cass watched Madison walk out of the room with a lug full of legos.  Steve used his now dry and tierd wings to get up next to Tooty.  "We don't know how this works, what if you DO disappear when Cass let's go?"
  Minister used it's tiny raccoon claws to work up the bedspread next to the Pixies.  Tooty felt the child's grip loosen.  "I don't know, but if Cass squeezes me much more I will pass out."  Tooty tried to wiggle her toes.  "I can't feel my feet, we have to do something."
  The invisible raccoon raised it hackles at this.  "They can't see me, but I can bite em' if necessary.  Just give me the word YoungOwl."
  Steve nodded in agreement with Minister.  Cass grabbed a pillow from the front of the bed and smoothed it out before setting Tooty down, and hesitantly let go of her. "I have so many questions."
  Tooty let out a huge sigh of relief after she took a few heavy breaths to get herself regulated.  Minister climbed up as close as possible to be available to claw at the child if necessary.   Steve stood ready on the other side with a long sharpened steel toothpick.

   ***  The day before the journey KettleStruck had presented Steve with the fine weapon, it's handle firmly and expertly crafted on in copper plating.  The thing had been stored in the Gremlin warehouses for a long time.  According to Kettle, the Gremlin's of long ago generations were known for their great weapon crafting, but more recently the clan had condemned the instruments of war as barbaric and useless. ***

  Cass leaned in to try and speak to Tooty again.  "Are you a real magical fairy? Where did you come from?"  Tooty tipped her head curiously trying to decide how to answer, if at all.
  "The human's will never be able to speak like us.  We might as well be telling a wasp not to sting."  Minister sat back on the fluffy banded tail, satisfied danger was not immanent.   
  Steve still held the Gremlin sword at his side and tried remembering what he had read and put in the notebook for the mission.  "Tooty, nod at Cass, and flutter your wings."
  Tooty agreed, and did.  The child smiled and became giggly.  "Why are you here?  Why me?  Can I have magic too!?"
  Tooty tucked her wings down, shrugged her shoulders and opened her arms wide with her hands palms up.
  Cass pondered this a bit and then seemed to come up with an idea.  "Can you grant wishes?"  Tooty shrugged again, and put her hand up to her chin in contemplation.
  Cass went to the dresser and grabbed an old yellowed picture to show to Tooty.  "It's my grandpa.  He used to tell us that he buried coins all over the farm yard, and one day me and Madison could dig them up and be rich!"
  Tooty flew up to the picture and nodded at the child.
  Steve and Minister were speaking over each other in protest.  "We can't do that!"  and "What are you thinking!".
  Minister slouched a bit, and then resolutely stated.  "You can't Pixie, but I can."
Minister then changed into a very fat mole with smooth shiny pink fur slicked all over.   Tooty pointed at the picture, waved at the child, and pointed at the farm house.
  "I don't understand."  Cass looked again where Tooty pointed.  "Do I need to take you there?"
  Tooty smiled big and yelled over her shoulder to BrewMinister and Steve.  "We can smell those coins if Minister can get a hole dug close enough Steve, and if we earn it's trust, maybe next we can assure Cass it's ok to take us with to the `bring your child to work` day!"
  Steve flew up close to the picture and grinned at Tooty.  "I guess there is no harm to be done in trying."
  On the horizon, behind the farmhouse the big old grizzled human stood in front of, was what had to be the original steam stack and foundry that were part of the present factory.
  BrewMinister wiggled the star shaped snout, clapped together the over-sized paws, and pointed out to dusk quickly approaching.  "We need to get this done, human's don't like the small ones out in the darkness anymore then we Gremlins do."
  Steve grabbed hold of the picture, plucked it out of Cass's hand.  To Cass it looked like it was hovering by magic in the air.  "Pretend you're doing it Tooty!"
  Tooty fluttered back up in front of the child's face to get it's attention, and made gentle wavy hand movements toward the picture.  "But Madison will have to go with us, and Madison doesn't believe me!"
  Tooty pointed to the floating picture.  Cass rolled it's eyes. "Well duh, ok, yeah!"

*******************************

  Steve had to weave and dodge every time Madison tried to knock the picture down to discover whatever trick Cass was playing.  "Fairies???  How come I can't see them?"  Madison nearly knocked the picture out of Steve's hand once more.
  Minister was currently rolling on the grass in laughter.  "Just kiss it already FlutterBait!"
  Tooty flew next to Steve to get Cass to protect him from the siblings doubting slaps at the picture ( and Steve).  "Stop, you're going to hurt it Madison!"
  Madison, still doubtful, but know very curious what was going to happen next pointed at the gate on the side of the yard.  "Well, if this magic Fairy is going to help us find all grandpa's old coins, we better go now, or we won't get back before dad gets home."
  Cass looked at Tooty in gratitude and patted the shoulder now covered in an olive green fleece.  "You can sit here if it's easier Fairy."  Tooty flew around the child to show it that she could indeed keep up with the human.  Steve decided it wouldn't be a bad thing for one of them to stick to the child just in case, and made himself comfortable on Cass's shoulder.   BrewMinister was hoping around as a bright orange fox.  "Oh this will be interesting!"

  As they jogged down the road toward a large patch of cornfield, Steve could hear Madison conferring with Cass in somber tones.
  Madison answered.  "I promise I wouldn't lie about this.  I want Dad to be able to pay Mom's medical bills, and Grandpa would have wanted us to dig it all up."
  Before they all got separated in the tall corn, Steve heard both children agreeing, "Mom would want us too." ,and "I miss her so much."   

Fartmoodles: Chapter 10

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
Chapter 10:
"How to mount a turtle"
Edit 1
By: Nellie Tobey


There Gremlins did not have a portal in the suburbs of the town, so travel needed to be made through the closest portal.   It was still a great distance for a Gremlin, and two Pixies to make in a day, so preparations had to be made.

  If Steve had visited the area before, he could zip and whoosh himself and Tooty there, but BrewMinister informed him that even if FlutterBait could manage it,  that particular method of Pixie travel was not compatible with Gremlin magics.

*** At some point BrewMinister had tried this out in the old country with a certain regal Pixie, but upon 'popping' into the designated destination, was over-come with such dizziness, that the Gremlin could not maintain a form long enough to travel any further than a few feet from where they arrived. Anything with a cervical spinal curve made BrewMinister nauseous and that happened to be every creature that the Gremlin knew how to form. ***

After denying the Owlets again the chance to join on the mission, the troupe of three headed out before dawn.  BrewMinister had led them through the portal to a wide fast river that could flow downstream to the town below.  Steve eyed the water nervously.  "How are we going to get there again?"
  Tooty was staring upstream watching for their rides.  "Turtles Steve, they aren't that scary!"
  BrewMinister patted Steve on the shoulder.  "These aren't the snapping kind like where you come from.  These reptiles are friendly."
  "I think I see them Minister, "  Tooty backed away from the sandy bank that spilled into the otherwise inaccessible river.  On either side of the bank were sharp cliffs of dirt and tree roots, where time had eroded away the soil.  It looked as if much of this fast river might have the same trim along the waters edge.
  Steve slowly stepped behind their Gremlin guide.  "I'll just see how you two do it."   Minister let out a slight giggle, and walked up to greet the two turtles who plowed their way into the sand with the large paddle appendages.  The two heads raised up to greet BrewMinister, and the Gremlin bowed to them.
  "First things first Pixies,  these turtles need you to promise there will be no Pixie magics used on the journey downstream."   Tooty looked curiously at Minister, and Steve was still slightly frozen in his place.  "You see, the wildlife here only knows our magic, and they don't want to be ....",  Minister conferred in silent gazes with the turtles for a moment,  "startled by any unexpected events."
  Tooty bowed to both turtles, and gave her belly salute to signify her promise.  Steve stepped forward finally and did the same.  He gulped saying, "On our honor."

***  The turtles at this point, had never really sensed fear from the gremlins, and were quite confused as to why such a magical being would be frightened.  They discussed it much on the journey downstream, and came to the conclusion that perhaps the nervous one was afraid of offending BrewMinister.  The Gremlin had been known to scare a bear away from a fresh salmon if there was sufficient cause. ***

  "Wait..."   Steve watched BrewMinister guide Tooty into the right way to sit balanced on the rounded shell of one of the turtles.  "There's only two?"
  BrewMinister made a gesture toward Steve, and Steve could swear the two turtles were laughing, or at least smiling at him.  "Tooty can ride on her own FlutterBait, you will ride with me."  Steve wanted to be slighted, but was also very grateful.
  Minister helped Steve slide up toward the head of the shell.  It wasn't near as slippery as he first imagined.  BrewMinister changed into medium sized water snake, and wrapped around Steve to keep him in place.  "I think maybe we should be making sure Tooty is safer first..."  Minister held up the snake head and thisped out, "Tooty is unafraid, and on the river, fear is what is most dangerous FlutterBait."
  Tooty pondered this, as her turtle used those strong flippers to make it's way back into the water.  Steve shivered a bit from the feeling of BrewMinister coiling tightly around his legs as their turtle heaved into the water to follow her.
  At first the water was lazy, and did not move very quickly.  Steve imagined it would have been faster to walk, or to carry Minister between them to the town.
"This isn't so bad,"  Steve looked over at Tooty who was actually lounging on the back of her turtle.  BrewMinister tasted the air, and shouted over to Tooty.  "The fast part is coming YoungOwl,  you'll need to sit properly for this part!"
  Steve felt the coils wrap again around him.  "Fast part?"   Steve watched Tooty bracing herself on all fours, and tuck her wings tightly to her back.
  BrewMinister toggled the snake head toward Steve.  "I hear your quite skilled at kiss the frog..."  Steve blushed a bit, "Think of this as hugging the turtle."
  "That is in NO WAY helpful Minister!"
  All that came from BrewMinister was a loud stuttering : "hizzz, hizzz, hzzz"

*********************
  Tooty had managed to ride the turtle quite gently, Minister had translated to her when they arrived, and was welcome to ride whenever she needed.  The turtle Steve rode was shaking it's head vigorously, mouth full of his foot. Steve spittering and sputtering water.
  It hadn't been far into the weaving and bobbing of the water, before Steve had paniced and opened his wings.  The air swept himself up and out of BrewMinisters grasp. The turtles had to bridge so that the Gremlin could climb up with Tooty.  Steve's ride then dove upstream to fetch Steve, and carried him gripped in it's mouth the rest of the way down river.
  BrewMinister smacked Steve on his sides a few times to help cough up some water.  "You FlutterBait, I have no idea how you managed to win with the Frog."
  Tooty wanted to ask, but seeing the misery Steve was in, walked over to help dry some of the water from his wings.  "Is it far to the human house now?"        
   Steve realized that they had arrived a bit later into the outskirts of the small span of houses than planned.  The sun had already been up for a fourth of the daytime.  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ... "  Tooty was gently using a swath of hankerchief to wipe his wings.  She blushed when he looked back at her.
  The turtles blinked at BrewMinister, then at the two Pixies, and made their way back into the water.
   "It's ok Pixie, I've been told you don't have these fast rivers where you are from."  Tooty cocked her head sideways at this.
   BrewMinister, now back in the green toadish form, winked very heavily at her.
   "No, we really don't."  Steve opened a pocket in the skirt in horror.  "My notebook!"  A shadow fell over him, almost visible to the other two.  "I'll have to start all over...."
    The still fishscale clad Gremlin, now done with the delays already thrust upon the mission, grabbed Steve by the arm and pulled him up onto his feet.  "We can give you all your answers about Gremlins again when we are done with this."
 
*** At this point there was a much agreed consensus among the Gremlins that the notebook should be somehow altered, as Steve had come to some awkward conclusions that they were not to happy to share with the other tiny folk.  One being that the process of urination produced the special brew, which they discovered was a bodily function none of them possessed in the way Steve had described.  The Owlets had become very adept at sneaking in to look at the notebook while FlutterBait slept. ***

They approached the grey two story house on the end of the road marked, 'Stout Ave'.   The children were in the fenced back yard as the adventuring scouts had reported.  The little clan of three slipped in through the gap at the gates hinges.
The two children, both with shoulder length hair, t-shirts, and jeans were swinging each other on a tire roped to a large Maple branch.
  Steve sighed in disappointment.  "How do we tell which one is a girl human?"
  BrewMinister huffed.  "What is it with you flying folks, why does it matter?"
  Tooty sensed some tension coming from Ministers now feathery ferret form.
  "Well the picture has a child with a frilly pink dress and a giant bow,  in most of our observations that's a female human."  Steve started to consider he may be treding on unstable ground.
   "What Steve means, Minister, is that in our area they are easily told apart from one another, and given the picture we had of that fairy thing, it would likely be a female that would want to hold on to me."
  BrewMinister still had a grim look, but then darted toward the children.   "So what does it mean when they look like this?"
  Steve considered before answering. "Well in that form, we can't really say.  They all sound and look alike at that age, unless they wear specific cloths."
  The Gremlin put short little arms up in the air in frustration.  "How very observant!"
  Tooty listened to the darker haired child, tell the other "I am done pushin'.  It's my turn to swing!"
  The lighter haired child held tighter to the rope suspending the noxious smelling rubber, and gave the other a big pouty smile.  "One more time, please?"
  Darker haired child got a mischievous twinkle in it's eyes and grabbed the rope above the lighter haired child's hands.  "I'm gonna twirl you till you fall off!" And the tire began swinging wildly with the lighter haired child giggled uncontrollably.
  Minister watched the lighter haired child grow a funny look, and it started yelling, "Ok!  Ok!  Stopppp!!!!"
  With that the darker haired child jerked the tire to a stop, and lighter child fell out onto the dirt.  At first the child whimpered and then it got up, and stomped away.
  BrewMinister nodded satisfactory and pointed.  "We should start with that one.  We can try the other one if this one proves incapable."
  Steve contemplated but then said nothing but, "Ok."
  Tooty flew over to the child, now digging it's feet into the ground to push itself around in the swing.  "HEY, LOOK AT ME!"
  The child slowed a bit, but didn't seem to acknowledge Tooty's presence.  She tried again.  "CHILD!  HERE I AM!!!"
  The child slowed some more, but only stared at the entrance to the house where it's sibling had exited.
  Tooty waved to Steve to fly up next to her to discuss what they should do.  "It's not working Steve....  They just ignore me... They aren't like the adults."
  Steve went to pull out his notebook, but remembered it was gone.  A dark blue glow came over him.  The child gasped, waving its hand in front of it, not far from where Steve hovered in the air.  Tooty realized what was happening.  "Steve, you need to make me glow."
   Steve took a deep breath and spouted, "Tooty, you couldn't make a cow fart on a windy day!"
   Tooty smiled, and started to laugh. "Was that supposed to make me angry? I don't like all that stink remember?"
   Steve remembered the day in the supermarket.  "You've been amazing me since the day I started teaching you our ways, and I don't ever want to stop being there to see your succeed."
   Tooty almost fell out of the air from forgetting to flap her wings.  A slow ultra violet glow started to come from her.  "Really?"
   Steve nodded and watched the child start to focus on Tooty. "Your make every day worth fighting for."
   Tooty's hair illuminated a bright green,  her skin speckled with bright purple specks, and the child's hand leaped forward and snatched her from in front of Steve.

*********************

Steve landed next to BrewMinister and followed the child as it carried Tooty into the house.  She could easily vanish and slip from it's grasp, but she was too busy avoiding looking at Steve.

  Steve grabbed Minister's attention.  "How did you know that was the one we needed?"
  Minister grunted.  "From what you have described to me,  your definition of female just needs to be brave, adventurous, and terrifying."  Steve closed his mouth tight, Minister slipped one last thing in before they jumped in through the open door.  "And who says I picked that one because I thought it a female?"



    

  

Fartmoodles: chapter 9

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
Chapter 9:
"Even hydrogenDioxide can kill you"
First Edit
by: Nellie Tobey

In the kitchen of the bar, the woman threw down a very large warm tortilla.  She was placing meat in it, and yelling out the door.  "I'll get you another in a minute Frank, and don't call me that."   She smiled a little and started gently sprinkling something with the letters CUMEN on the meat.   Tooty held out her hand and got some powder to taste.
  Steve looked impatiently back out the door at BrewMinister standing by 'Frank's' drink tipping a drop of brew into Frank's short stout glass.  "Is it going to work?"  Steve couldn't sense flavor, and had no idea what the difference was between water, or the stuff humans liked to call 'hot sauce'.
  Tooty relished the new sensation from the brown powder.  "I can't imagine why not."   She then flew over at the cambro with the green peppers in it and took a taste. "Oh these.... These are...",  Tooty coughed, and her eyes watered, "perfection."   Steve flew over to minister to let them know it would work.
   A few moments later a yellow and fucia chameleon handed the small copper lined glass bottle to Tooty, she poured it onto the top most peppers vigorously.
BrewMinister gasped. "No no no, that's way too much!"
   Tooty smiled at the concerned Gremlin.  "If we aim to cause mischief, we need to do this right."
   Minister lashed out the lizard tongue and took a taste of the peppers.  "Oh, this is going to be interesting, I do say ..."  And BrewMinister stopped and said nothing more, but smiled oddly at Tooty.
  Steve had a pang of jealousy, and tried to control it. "You two just keep on talking, but I think our human is getting ready to leave!"
  The man in the suit jacket stood and was shaking someones hand.  The bartender was just carrying out the burrito covered in the enhanced jalapenos.  Steve, Tooty, and an agitated chameleon stood on the bar counter watching intently.  "Hey Morgan, you're not leaving before you get a taste of my cooking are you?"
  The suit pointed to his coworkers,  "They'll devour it, I promise.  Not a one of them turns down free food, and I gotta go home to the kids."
   The woman nodded and placed her other hand on his shoulder.  "You will let me know if you need any help.  You have your hands full, and anyone in this town would be happy to help."
  Morgan nodded. He laid his hand on hers in a grateful gesture.  "She was the one who would know what to do, and I know she'd want me to home with them Martha."  He paused for a second, took out his wallet and handed her another 50.  "Don't let any of them drive if you can stop them.  Ed and Gerry will walk, they are smart, but those other new ones just aren't smart enough."
  Martha took the 50 and smiled.  "I already got two sets of keys, you know I'll get John's with a wink and a nudge."
  Morgan laughed and bowed out the front door.
  Minister had turned into a ferret and was growling at the floor.  "We didn't get a chance!"  Tooty poked the ferret in the ribs.
  "We still got that burrito, let us see what the others know."  Steve gave a sharp head nod when minister looked at him.
  BrewMinister smiled at Tooty in that odd way again.  "And if we don't, we sure as flip have a time getting them humans into trouble!"

    *******************************

It was nearly morning and three empty bottles of goblin brew #99 were scattered by Steve's tent, as Tooty sipped from her mother's goblet.  Kettle, Red and Minister were giggling at the idea that Tooty had effectively talked Martha into inviting John out to pizza after the bar had closed.
  Kettle pointed at Tooty in a grievous way suddenly. "Who would of thought a well timed stink would make them laugh so hard. You dear are a Master."  Tooty did a curtsy and  raised the goblet.
  "To being invisible, and knowing that Frank can't hold one in!"
  The three gremlins cheered and then Kettle and Red's eyes drew down in a sudden sleep.  BrewMinister stood, seemingly unaffected by his two empty bottles, and walked up to admire the cup in Tooty's grasp.  "I do believe this is some of the best copper work ever produced in this village."
  Tooty dropped the cup and stared at Minister.  "My mother."  She fluttered her wings without even knowing it.  "It was my mom wasn't it!"  Minister smiled, picked up the goblet and handed it back.
  "T'wasn't me that said a thing."  And BrewMinister turned and walked away into the darkness as a great fluffy tailed squirrel.  The squirrel turned around before being swallowed by the dark.  "Her light was engulfing, but it was your father's glow that I always fancied."  Then the brown and silver tail danced away into the shadow.

***********************************

  Tooty was busy playing swords with the Owlets (they informed Tooty it was their new club name),  as once again the biggest one snapped it's pine needle trying to stab a dead leaf on the ground.  The smaller two jabbed and swung at Tooty as she blocked and danced around to give them a chance to swing at her.  "The brown needles will just keep breaking, they're not flexible any more."  She noticed Steve approaching with his notebook swinging from one hand and a determined look on his face.  "Ok Owlets, I gotta get back to work."
  There was a slight protest, and then they started digging through the pile of pine needles for greener weapons.
  Steve got close and couldn't contain himself, "I figured it out Tooty, I think I know how to get the information, but it's going to be dangerous."
  She took a look at the magazine page Steve handed her.  "The children? No Steve, I refuse.  The Gremlins will too."  The picture was of a girl playing with a doll that very much resembled a fairy, but was far to pale, big headed and lacked the claws or mandibles. It could be a Pixie if the appendages weren't so short and the wings so smooth.  A Pixie also didn't sparkle.  Maybe glow from time to time, but never sparkle.
  "Hear me out, we won't hurt them, or do anything that could put them in harms way."  Steve sighed a bit.  "Not any harm the human's aren't putting them in already that is."

***********************

   BrewMinister, OldRed, and KettleStruck immediately refused.  Steve was still trying to explain, "They are going to be in factory anyways, we just need to get a good look around without being sucked into some bit of machinery."  
   Tooty tried to help Steve explain, but was also not very fond of the idea. "It happens sometimes in our region, and most times the kids end up opening the jar at some point so we can get out."
   BrewMinister shook the restless porcupine quills occupying their backside.  "I promised your mother and father absolutely no harm would come to you, and I will not deliberately let you be in a jar for a human to carry around on some cold cement factory floor!"
   Steve started rifling through the pages of one of the books he had gotten from the goblin market. "These things where the humans take the small ones to work, it's not that dangerous."  Steve showed them the picture of a big man in bright yellow garb and a ridiculous plastic hat.  The man and two other big ones were guiding a group of small ones all with the same hats and yellow garb to match.  "See here,  they make them all wear this protection, and Tooty is smart, strong and fierce, she wouldn't be in danger in the hands of a child."
  Tooty was taken aback by the compliment, but then watched Kettle and Red do the hand gestures and Minister waving furry paws to say no.  Minister finally turned around and walked away.  "Damn humans!"
  Kettle and Red nodded and spoke, "We are sorry for the silent communication, but some things are still the Gremlin way no matter how much we want to include both of you."  Steve started to believe maybe his plan had hope.  Red pointed at the giant rat trap on the next page of Steve's book.  "The thing is, we could not help you, we could not be in that place to make sure you two come out safely. "
  Steve started to protest, but Kettle held up it's hand, slightly translucent in the sunlight.  "But we are also going to all die if we don't find out how to stop this."
  Tooty felt her determination harden inside.  "I will be fine, we go among the humans, in their human places all the time where we are from."  It was a tiny lie, she herself had just begun training to do just that.  "Steve is our top academic, and there is no one more equipped with the knowledge I'll need to survive in there."
  BrewMinister had returned, clad in a suit of fish scale armor, "If we leave our Shepard, we die, if we let this human poison continue, we die."  Red and Kettle tried interrupting Minister but that just made the Gremlin louder.  "The way I see it, we have to get in there and stop this, I'm the strongest one of our village, and I will not die before I try anything possible to stop this."
  Tooty pointed at the picture of the 'not' fairy and the child.  "First thing we have to do is find Morgan's kids and figure out how to get them to see me."
  Steve unrolled the blue flyer that was at the pizza joint Martha and John ended up in.  It read 'Bring your kids to work day'.
  Tooty put a firm hand on BrewMinisters slimy fishy shoulder. "Time to get yours truly caught in a jar."   

story idea #98

As I write the introduction to my idea,  I have hurried and written the idea.
My memory was good when I was a teen.  After years in the mental health system it was severely destroyed by the amount, and variety of medications they guinea pigged me with in the system.  The system saved me in a way, but it also left lasting damage.  Another reason I like the Matt Daemon character, he spurns the system with such grace and profanity.  And well, Robin Williams, who I grew up with.  'Mork and Mindy'  is the search term you want, younger folks.

Anyways, I know if I write this little fiction, it would be an egocentric exploration, but I imagine there are a lot of people out there who wish they had a pill to bring them back to normal/exceeds normal memory.  And while there are those that want super strength, laser eyes, the ability to heal, badass quick moves, telepathy, all those other things, this is a super power I would find near and dear to my heart. 

example:
I don't intend to tell a lie.   Sometimes I get in the middle of saying something, and I honestly can't remember the answer.  I have to flub it. 
Someone: "What were you doing yesterday"
Me: "I made a chapter."
Someone: "That's it?"
Me:  *trying to remember if I was working or home that night, trying to remember if I did anything else*  "I made supper, nothing much"

My nephew once tried labelling everything that was incorrect, a lie.  That's not exactly true.  Sometimes, we don't know the exact details, and have to guess.  I just happen to have to theorize and guess a lot.  I might have said to someone, "Your goat has the rippled fur of a highland Norwegian Elkhound."
But what comes back when I try to remember the conversation is:
"Your goat looks like a dog from that snowy place."

Anyways the story idea.
The stuff I hurried and wrote before this intro:
***********************************************

I had to hurry and write the idea down.  I started watching 'Good Will Hunting', and I absolutely adore the movie, but I am always jealous of people with good, or even normal memories. 



_______________________________________
heroine: memory handicap intellectual

There is a memory pill that increases memory. For normal people it's not a huge benefit...  but for someone with a deficit, it's a huge improvement.

She normally has skills and intellect that can rival many, but can't use it efficiently because she can't locate memory to store things she's learned, and apply it without great effort.

She takes the pill, becomes slightly better then neural typical, but because of the stuff stored away that she couldn't reach, she can now have super power like ability to read situations and problems with an almost physic ability.  Years of trying to predict behavior, and predict needed responses has programmed a pathway in her brain to search for data to make the right thing happen, the right response, the right answer, and now.... she can, with a supernatural ability, because now, she can remember the ways in which to do all the things she was always reaching to achieve.

little poem

The Forest

hope like an ember
fading in the cold
what light is this in the dark
to heat an aching soul

Fartmoodles: chapter 8

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
chapter 8 : "A wet burrito"
edit #1
by: Nellie Tobey


The gremlin village was not much of a village at all.  A few haphazard silk huts had been erected by an enormous Bristlecone Pine.  Steve stared at the tree hypnotized He could almost see the centuries radiating around the massive trunk.  Tooty was admiring a needle from its branches.  It was rigid but soft, and very nicely pointed.  A great size to fit squarely under a thumbnail.

  OldRed and KettleStruck were obviously ignoring one another.  The two younglings had been taken to the base of the ancient pine where a shaman was looking them over and assessing what needed to be done. OldRed stood on two Hawk feet staring down at the little ones.  Kettle was in Wolverine form on the outer edge of the tree's base watching everything and pacing. Massive paws were treading a path into the hard earth.

Tooty nudged Steve out of his trance.  He swore the tree had been singing for a second. Tooty pointed to the creek downhill from where they stood. "Is that where the younglings got into the stuff?"
  Steve looked over his notes and a nicely drawn map that one of the gremlins had provided. "It must be, looks that way on here."  Steve led the way to the sandy edge of the flowing waters.  "I don't understand why they brought the two little ones with them on this trip.  It seems much safer if something was making them diminish, to stay close to home."
   Tooty stuck her pine needle down into an iridescent patch of water.  It was unnatural and beautiful, and wrong.   "Not if the home is where the danger is."   She held the needle end up for Steve to examine.  "What is it?"
   Steve remembered that it had been coming in contact with it had made the gremlins ill.  "We don't have anything like this back home.  It's definitely human."
   Steve handed a piece of tartan cloth to Tooty. She wiped it off.  "Look Steve, it leaves that same shine on the cloth."   Tooty tried to put it in the water and wash it off.   It only seemed to get thinner and spread.  "What is this?!"  Tooty put the cloth in her pocket deciding that later, at the fire, it would be best to burn it.

                                *****************************
  The younglings had recovered enough to sit next to the fire pit as twilight rolled in and the small branches were being stacked.   Kettle and Red started to talk in short bursts with their hands.  Even not knowing what it meant, Tooty could tell it was a formal focused set of statements.  A gremlin from the town approached them as other gremlins had started to fit Steve and Tooty with new skirts.   Tooty's Black with grey trim, and Steve's Yellow with black trim.  Tooty imagined her Aunt would love to see the way they sewed the thick cloth. Not a seem was visible.  The gremlin, in the shape of a very enormous beetle, pointed to the town lights in the distance, "We will visit the local bar first, See what the humans are saying."
  Steve remembered what OldRed had told him.  He interrupted the older Gremlin's silent conversation. "The one that can open the door in that factory, will it be there?" OldRed nodded.
  Tooty looked over at the two young gremlins kicking at a gigantic pine cone.  They were seeing who could get the thing to move.
  "They seem to be recovering. I am glad."  KettleStruck changed, purple spots ablaze and spear in hand.  "Is everything ok KettleStruck?"  Tooty watched the grip from those long green fingers loosen on the shaft.
  "I have some of our journey-skilled gremlins scouting for a fresh source of water."   Kettle looked up at the tree towering above.   "The old one has to have water, and if that stuff can hurt us, it can hurt our great Sheperd."
  Steve made note of the reverence that was given the giant pine.  Tree's were considered sacred in their home region also, but this was something much more. He did not have a word for it yet.  "We can't possibly move that tree... can we?"
  Tooty looked to OldRed, "We're here to stop the humans, aren't we?"
  KettleStruck sighed.  "We don't know how to influence the human's like you do.  We can add spirit to their drink, but otherwise, we are completely unable to interact with them.   I am told the Fartmoodle clan has a specific charm that allows you to talk them into small things,  influence them."
   Steve dropped his jaw. While other Pixies could make suggestions to the humans, what Tooty had done in the supermarket, getting the human to open the door by influencing his choices, was a clan secret.  Suggestions were easily dismissed by most humans, and the other pixies had rarely been able to get a human swayed enough to do as intended.

*** A clan called FistMongers was constantly trying to get humans to physically fight one another,  and was only successful by making physical objects move.  A very infamous trick among them was to talk cats into knocking objects from surfaces for no apparent reason.  It did involve risking ones safety by enticing the cat to believe the fairy was a tiny red light to be swatted at, and some had died in glorious tactics to achieve such feats.  Cats were also not prone to suggestion, but they couldn't resist a brightly lit dot placed in the perfect location. The dot most times being the fairy itself.  No scholar was sure if the cats could see the fairy itself in this form, but it was debated enthusiastically.***

What Fartmoodles could do with humans was almost direct communication.  Steve regained his composure. "How did you know?"
  Tooty stood silent, waiting for an answer.  She had just learned the skill not that long ago and hadn't known about it until it was her turn to be taught it.
Steve said she was a natural, and better even than her mother.
  OldRed answered this time,  "One of our elder members was once friends with a pixie of your clan in the old lands.  They would often sneak off to human grounds and ... "
  KettleStruck finished for Red, "They would cause mischief of legend."
  Tooty tried to imagine what pixie it must have been to cause the kind of bravo-ed tones happening between Kettle and Red.  Steve was excited, "Who?  Who was it?" 
   Red and Kettle made a hand gesture that resembled a great claw, and then what could not be mistaken, 'NO'.  "We can not tell you."
   Tooty remembered the piece of cloth in her vest, "What can you tell us about this stuff in the water?"  She unfolded it and the Gremlins both had to stop themselves from backing away suddenly.
  "That's what is making our kind ill.  The younglings got into it, thinking it was pretty, something from our great Shepard.  They were down for days.  We had to take them to our sunniest clearing in these woods to keep them from blinking away."   Kettle picked the cloth out of Tooty's hand carefully avoiding the spots where the liquid shimmered.
   Red stepped forward, "I'm going to show them KettleStruck."  Kettle held the cloth out. OldRed put  one green wrinkly hand on it to demonstrate.   The skin began to fade. A dimly glowing skeleton shape in glistening lime-green fog.
  Kettle pulled the cloth away.  "That's enough.  We can't have you getting sick on us too."  Tooty took it from KettleStruck and walked to the fire.   She tossed it in, letting the vile thing burn.   The thing sparked and hissed, sending tiny wisps of white-hot embers from its surface.
  Steve wrote more notes.  "We shouldn't try to burn it."  Steve pointed to a torch in the distance that had been placed by the huts set up for himself and Tooty.

  ***  The Gremlins, while having no issue with doing the extra work to put the structures up, had been thoroughly baffled that Tooty and Steve did not sleep in the same space.  According to BrewMinister, the safest and more logical thing to do for creatures that required such a state of unconsciousness would be to be side by side, in a group.  The others had nodded in agreement with BrewMinister. ***

    Steve then pointed to the embers still emanating from the cloth.  "If it isn't safe to touch, it is probably more dangerous when it has that kind of reaction."
    Tooty noticed the scouts had returned and gathered around a large black cauldron that they were.... what looked like, urinating in.
    KettleStruck let out a snort and a giggle when Tooty's concern couldn't be hidden in her face.  "It's tradition, to bring a little brew with us on these missions.  It loosens the human's tongues, and we need to find out what that poison is."
  Steve looked over at the gathering around the pot. "Oh well, that makes sense!"
  Tooty admired Steve's ability to glean information from the world around them, but in this case, she was pretty sure she did not want to know what 'made sense'.

                           ***************************************

After the scouts had tracked the shiny liquid to an empty reservoir labeled with a town companies logo, A plan had been established.

The small crew of Pixie and Gremlin stood at the portal erected to enter the town built up around the companies factories.
  The younglings hopped around the three of them, (BrewMinister, Tooty and Steve)  begging to come along.  They had chosen the form of tiny barn owls at the fire the night before and hadn't changed since.

  Tooty and Steve looked to BrewMinister to handle the little ones. They now understood BrewMinister's role was warrior and mischief master.  The younglings wanted the warrior's approval.

  "When you are recovered, I promise."  The two little ones bowed their feathery heads.  Tooty watched them hop away and hoot between themselves. BrewMinister led Tooty and Steve through the portal.

 
  In an instant, the small Trio stood behind the local bar. "Our scouts have been keeping track of our target, they say the human is here, with his workmates tonight."  Steve was admiring the scent coming from the giant dumpster sitting beside the back door.

BrewMinister continued. "We need to know where they keep it, how to destroy it. The human is seen entering and exiting the place that smokes and stinks. 
  Steve nodded in agreement. "We may get more information that can give us a better solution.  In our experience, no matter how much you try to get the humans to stop doing something dangerous, they will just keep doing it."
  Tooty nodded.  "They'll just make more."
  BrewMinister, taking the form of an enormous cockroach climbed the wall beneath the open window.  Brew waved with foggy brown wings from the sill when they were sure the place was safe.   Tooty and Steve flew up and crawled under the wooden pane.  The kitchen was clean but old and worn.   The cook, they had been told, was also the bartender, and she was not to be disturbed if at all possible.  There was a certain respect for the human that the Gremlins were not keen to explain.
  They made it behind the bar without any issue, and found the target sitting in the corner at a large round booth with the other factory workers.  They dressed in similar attire, except the one in the blue suit jacket, he was the one they needed.  BrewMinister, hiding behind the bottles of vodka was changed back to traditional form, and pulling out the Gremlin brew.  They nodded among one another and Tooty and Steve made their way over to the table to listen to the human's talk.   Four of them had drinks, but the suited man had only water.
One of the four tried to offer him a shot glass.
  "You know I don't drink." The suited man pushed the glass back at the employee. "You guys have fun, it's bonus week, I'm paying."
  Tooty frowned.  "Well, the brew is out of the question."
  Steve and Tooty listened to the humans talk about sports, movies, and someone at the factory they referred to as "that Dingus."  The suited man spoke up when the conversation about the person turned to malicious comments.  "I'm not supposed to let you all know this, but the reason he's gotten so bitter, is because his brother down in waste management just got diagnosed with Cancer again."
  The employees looked ashamed of themselves.  Tooty took the opportunity to get up on the suited man's shoulders.  She cleared her throat and yelled into his ear.  "WHAT IS IN THE FACTORY?"  The suited man stiffened and held up his glass of water.  "To Gabe, and all those lost to that vicious disease."  The others raised their glasses too, and a somber shadow fell over the group.
  Steve fluttered off to talk to BrewMinister.   When he came back, Tooty had made her rounds to each of the people at the table, and tried to get them to say what was in the factory.  "I'm not sure what to do Steve."
  Steve was holding the gremlin brew.
  "But it won't work with the water, the Gremlins said it has to have a really distinct flavor to cover it's presence."  Steve then walked over to the menu sitting in front of who they now knew was called 'boss', and kneeled in prayer.  Tooty followed when she saw the picture and the human words written below it.
"Wet Burrito,  extra spicy"

Steve finished his little prayer, and stood.  Tooty knew what needed to be done.
 

Fartmoodle: Chapter 7

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
Chapter 7: "Like being in a closed room with an angry Skunk.'
second edit
By: Nellie Tobey

KettleStruck had lost all patience. The debt was paid in full, with every scrap and bobble they had brought with them.  But now the Goblin magistrate wanted an 'Overdue' fee on top of it.  Kettle was very sure there was going to be a tribe meeting soon to discuss a different passage around the Human cities.

"Your honor, we've given you all there was, and that was the debt, can we not take care of these, "  Kettle tried not to snarl, "Overdues our next trip through?"

The Magistrate's ears were especially droopy from the amount of heavy gems and jewelry hanging from the tips. "If we let one member do it, then EVERYONE will think they can.  It is non-negotiable."

Kettle's mouse form was growing extremely hard to hold.  "Our kind can not survive in the mines, without light, we die in days.  Can you really justify a life is worth that amount of credit?"

The Magistrate grew grim, and raised a long fingered hand into the air.  "You knew the price of going beyond your capability to pay, when you refused to make right your debt on time."

Kettle's mouse grew significantly bigger, and the fur started developing streaks of violet. "My little ones have no chance at all.  They will die if they don't see sunshine for seven days,  At least let me take their punishment, and work the mines."   Kettle forced herself back into the small mouse, but the purple streaks remained.
The goblin pondered for a moment, and called to another goblin, who's ears were spry from the lack of decoration. The two goblins whispered together for a short time, and the two sets of ears twitched as they spoke.  For a moment Kettle thought maybe the virgin eared one was gesturing for mercy from the loppy eared one.
  Kettle heard a conceeding 'Ok, but I don't want the blame for this.'
  Dangling hoops clanged against the gems in the floppy ears when the magistrate stood.  "Dishonor upon the Gremlin KettleStruck, who shall be restricted from credit for the next three seasons.  No goblin trade will be allowed on behalf of your tribe."
  Kettle knew it wasn't going to be that simple.  The goblin magistrate continued, "But for the balance owing on the final debt and as punishment, You shall offer one of the Pixies into our services for no longer then the length of those three seasons. "
  The Badger had sprung out of Kettle without any forewarning, and Kettle just managed to restrain it's size.  "They aren't even a part of the clan, they are visitor's from an entirely different region, we can not make a deal for their servitude, it's unheard of even for the Goblins!"
  The magistrate frowned a bit, and then called in the guards.  "Dowse it with the diminishing dust, and take it to our dungeons."
  Kettle did not fight, but felt the dust, falling like light grey snows upon the fur. The teeth were straining to stay hidden under the gums, but this gremlin had not achieved such rank with hostile invocations.  The dust made everything heavy, even the eyes.  Soon Kettle was a sleeping small badger being dragged away to the Goblin Market dungeons.

  ********   ****    --------    *****   ********

"What do you mean we're leaving Kettle?!"  Tooty had already retrieved her steel pick sword from the right vest pocket.  The Gremlins were all quite ready to put themselves into turtle form, but as they transferred messages in their hand language, no one wanted to volunteer to be the one, 'not turtle', to drag Tooty through the portal just behind Steve.
   ***  If you intertwine your thumbs and wag your fingers like your making the wall shadow of a bird, you'd get 'FlutterBait',  but Steve is the easier translation in this case.  Many hand words had dual meaning,  and at the moment the one finger of solitude was being flashed about quite readily.  Along with ,  'I ain't getting stabbed!' ***

  Steve remained calm, wondering if he would have jumped to such passion if one of his Gremlin escorts had been taken to the dungeons.  Clearly they had an unsettled debt and knew the consequences, why had they done such a deed and expected to get away with it?  "Why would they put KettleStruck in captivity if the debt had been paid?" He tried to reason with his ward. "Tooty, it is the Goblin Market law."
  Tooty turned her small jabby blade towards Steve's belly.  "We are part of this Steve, and we will not allow one of our own to be unjustly kept like this."
  Steve was no longer calm, and his wings twittered slightly as he looked at that matte shine on the scary end of her blade.  "I can't let you go in the Gremlin's place Tooty.  It was not our debt, not our crime."   Steve took a deep breath and stepped into the point of the sword.  "Let me go, but don't send me back to your parents with news you were a Goblin servant for even a second." Tooty still held firm and looked like she was struggling to decide.  Steve stepped in so that the point was very close to piercing his flesh.  "Or kill me.  It would be death to see a student of mine subjugated in this way."

Tooty dropped her sword, and her wings went from boldy arching around her, to laying sadly at her sides.  "We can't let them suffer this either Steve."  She looked at the other gremlins whose hands now were still at their sides.  Most had taken on the form of dark furred rats, but one stood triumphantly toadlike,  with long tendrils of white curls starting to grow out of it's previously bald head.  The hair grew long and luxurious, and then two big pointy ears popped into existence on either side of the head.

The other gremlins started pulling jewelry from any pocket they could find, and began pinching it onto the ears whose skin, along with the rest of the body, grew orange instead of green.  "YoungOwl, we have a plan."
  Tooty looked at Steve, and Steve smiled.  "It's your name with them now."  Steve wrote furiously in his notebook.  Tooty looked sideways at the now striking image of a grand old goblin mistress now giving orders to the pack.  The rats scurried into the shadows and were absorbed by it.
  OldRed fiddled with another necklace pulled from a bag on it's shoulder.  "We'll get KettleStruck, I just need a little trust from you two."
  Tooty and Steve agreed instantly.  Both echoing the other, "Let's do it."

  Steve and Tooty walked behind OldRed as the Mistress goblin form met with distressed looks from the other goblin's they passed.  Tooty got close enough to whisper in the ears, "They don't seem convinced OldRed."
  Hurriedly rifling through pages, Steve made a triumphant snort and then gasped... then got closer to Tooty to give her the message to relay to OldRed, "Tell them the ears are how they display desire for companionship, the ears are way to perky for such weight of jewelry, OldRed is making them all seriously uncomfortable!"
   Tooty went to whisper up to OldRed, but they turned around ran a long fingered hand through the long white curls.  "Darlings, I've got this covered, I know what I'm doing."  Noticing a few curious onlookers, OldRed spoke up a bit louder,  "You call me Mistress or you shall add even more time to your sentence!"
The pixies took to following the mistress again instead of offering advice.
  When they met the guards at the front of the gates a golden faced rat could be seen in the distance scurrying around a different set of guards and down a stairway.
  The Mistress stood firm in front of the two guards, and watched them nervously trying to avoid looking at her ears.  "You two need to let me in, I have business in those dungeons."
  The guards, with dry throtes hoarsely made out the words, "Yes ma'am."  And moved out of the way.  The mistress motioned for Tooty and Steve to proceed, but before she followed, she nudged the older more broad shouldered goblin and said quietly, "The Magistrate asked for this in our exchange last night."  The mistress handed the guard a bottle of the Gremlin Special Brew #99, winked, and then followed Tooty and Steve down the stairs.
 *** Gremlin Brew #99 looked very similar to the tiny sample bottles of whiskey in this area. (identical)  They were very similar in taste also (It really was the sample whiskey with that special Gremlin component added), but as anyone who has had more then one sip of the stuff can tell you, the next morning you'll wish for a grave about as much as you wish for the toilet to stop spinning.***

The guards at the bottom door were not so easily distracted by the Mistress.  They were granite faced, and firm in their answer.  "No one get's in or out without written permission from the Magistrate."    Steve nudged Tooty's arm and pointed to the rat tail sticking out from what was a very subtle amount of wall missing around the corner.   Tooty dropped to her knees, and began to plead with the mistress, "Please, I don't want to go in the dungeons ma'am!"
   OldRed's blue speckles started showing through the orange.  Steve noticed it now too.  Steve bent to one knee, and pleaded also, "We are fragile tiny folk, our wings are brittle and a dungeon would surely kill us!"
   OldRed's goblin ears started to droop, and oddly to the guard's perception, they were shrinking.  "Wait, "  The guard was about to pull his daggers when a great commotion came from the other side of the door.  Goblins were pounding on it, yelling, "Let us out!", and "For the love of all the money in the world you have to get us outside!!"
  More voices joined, and the guards hurried to open the large double doors,  OldRed had transformed back into a small raccoon, and was standing aside while the furry little paw remained in front of Tooty and Steve warning them to stay against the wall.
  The goblins went running out the doors, and soon, so did the bewildered goblins holding open the doors as their faces twisted in an unnatural way.   It hit Steve first. "Oh the heavens, I haven't smelled that godly odor in such a long time!"  Tooty got a whiff and dove her arms into her top pockets looking for the peppermint and a handkerchief to cover her nose and mouth.
   Charging through the doorway came a barking skunk.  It's teeth were shining with drool, and it's eyes darted around viciously.  OldRed jumped forward, "Who got hurt KettleStruck?  What happened?"
   Kettle transformed into the silver rabbit and hopped hurriedly back to the room to show them.
  The two younglings, now laying limp on the ground in their chipmunk form, were still and silent.  Tooty rushed over and began examining one, Steve the other.
  KettleStruck held back a torrential downpour. "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!"
  OldRed bowed, and looked smaller by the second.  "We had to save you."
  KettleStruck bellowed again.  "I would have survived, I could escape on my own, you may have lost our younglings in this stupid stunt Red!"
  The other gremlins kept trying to take on a shape that would be useful in carrying the two little ones safely, but couldn't manage to pull them efficiently off the ground.  Steve looked quizzically at them. "You can change into a Beaver or something can't you?  Why can't you lift them?"
  "It's hard to explain, but when we are unconscious, we are heavier, and harder to displace from the earth.  We look like these forms, but we do not bear the same physical strength."
   Steve nodded to Tooty, and they each grabbed one of the young critters.  Pixies were much much stronger then the normal tiny folk, and although it was not an allowed display of Pixie magics, it was going to be done.  Tooty and Steve easily lifted the chipmunks and flew passed OldRed and KettleStruck.  Tooty yelled at them as they zoomed by.  "You two get it sorted, We gotta get them out of here!"

They had all made it through the portal without much of a chase. Most goblins ran, or dove out of the way as they travelled through the streets and alleys.

  Only one thing scares Goblins more than a cat.  And that's a skunk.