Fartmoodles: Chapter 11

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
Chapter 11
"That's what we call broke."
Edit 1
By: Nellie Tobey

Notes:
I really had no idea what I was going to do with these characters, and any time I start writing I just kinda decide.  What thing will they do for this part?  Originally the concept was to create something my nephew could enjoy and have some teachable moments for current social situations.  But honestly it all started because I thought something with farts and magical creatures would be something he'd really enjoy.


  Steve and Minister watched with anticipation as the child called 'Cass' kept trying to convince the sibling 'Madison' that there was something in it's hands.
Madison, with rolling eyes said again, "You aren't fooling me Cass. You're just gonna ask me to pull your finger or something silly."
  Cass with slumped shoulders stomped over to the bottom bunkbed to sulk while still holding Tooty tightly.  "Are you going to disappear if I let you go fairy?"
  Tooty tried not to be offended, and shouted 'NO', as she shook her head.  It felt like the child was starting to hear her.  At least it was starting to communicate with her in some way.
  Cass watched Madison walk out of the room with a lug full of legos.  Steve used his now dry and tierd wings to get up next to Tooty.  "We don't know how this works, what if you DO disappear when Cass let's go?"
  Minister used it's tiny raccoon claws to work up the bedspread next to the Pixies.  Tooty felt the child's grip loosen.  "I don't know, but if Cass squeezes me much more I will pass out."  Tooty tried to wiggle her toes.  "I can't feel my feet, we have to do something."
  The invisible raccoon raised it hackles at this.  "They can't see me, but I can bite em' if necessary.  Just give me the word YoungOwl."
  Steve nodded in agreement with Minister.  Cass grabbed a pillow from the front of the bed and smoothed it out before setting Tooty down, and hesitantly let go of her. "I have so many questions."
  Tooty let out a huge sigh of relief after she took a few heavy breaths to get herself regulated.  Minister climbed up as close as possible to be available to claw at the child if necessary.   Steve stood ready on the other side with a long sharpened steel toothpick.

   ***  The day before the journey KettleStruck had presented Steve with the fine weapon, it's handle firmly and expertly crafted on in copper plating.  The thing had been stored in the Gremlin warehouses for a long time.  According to Kettle, the Gremlin's of long ago generations were known for their great weapon crafting, but more recently the clan had condemned the instruments of war as barbaric and useless. ***

  Cass leaned in to try and speak to Tooty again.  "Are you a real magical fairy? Where did you come from?"  Tooty tipped her head curiously trying to decide how to answer, if at all.
  "The human's will never be able to speak like us.  We might as well be telling a wasp not to sting."  Minister sat back on the fluffy banded tail, satisfied danger was not immanent.   
  Steve still held the Gremlin sword at his side and tried remembering what he had read and put in the notebook for the mission.  "Tooty, nod at Cass, and flutter your wings."
  Tooty agreed, and did.  The child smiled and became giggly.  "Why are you here?  Why me?  Can I have magic too!?"
  Tooty tucked her wings down, shrugged her shoulders and opened her arms wide with her hands palms up.
  Cass pondered this a bit and then seemed to come up with an idea.  "Can you grant wishes?"  Tooty shrugged again, and put her hand up to her chin in contemplation.
  Cass went to the dresser and grabbed an old yellowed picture to show to Tooty.  "It's my grandpa.  He used to tell us that he buried coins all over the farm yard, and one day me and Madison could dig them up and be rich!"
  Tooty flew up to the picture and nodded at the child.
  Steve and Minister were speaking over each other in protest.  "We can't do that!"  and "What are you thinking!".
  Minister slouched a bit, and then resolutely stated.  "You can't Pixie, but I can."
Minister then changed into a very fat mole with smooth shiny pink fur slicked all over.   Tooty pointed at the picture, waved at the child, and pointed at the farm house.
  "I don't understand."  Cass looked again where Tooty pointed.  "Do I need to take you there?"
  Tooty smiled big and yelled over her shoulder to BrewMinister and Steve.  "We can smell those coins if Minister can get a hole dug close enough Steve, and if we earn it's trust, maybe next we can assure Cass it's ok to take us with to the `bring your child to work` day!"
  Steve flew up close to the picture and grinned at Tooty.  "I guess there is no harm to be done in trying."
  On the horizon, behind the farmhouse the big old grizzled human stood in front of, was what had to be the original steam stack and foundry that were part of the present factory.
  BrewMinister wiggled the star shaped snout, clapped together the over-sized paws, and pointed out to dusk quickly approaching.  "We need to get this done, human's don't like the small ones out in the darkness anymore then we Gremlins do."
  Steve grabbed hold of the picture, plucked it out of Cass's hand.  To Cass it looked like it was hovering by magic in the air.  "Pretend you're doing it Tooty!"
  Tooty fluttered back up in front of the child's face to get it's attention, and made gentle wavy hand movements toward the picture.  "But Madison will have to go with us, and Madison doesn't believe me!"
  Tooty pointed to the floating picture.  Cass rolled it's eyes. "Well duh, ok, yeah!"

*******************************

  Steve had to weave and dodge every time Madison tried to knock the picture down to discover whatever trick Cass was playing.  "Fairies???  How come I can't see them?"  Madison nearly knocked the picture out of Steve's hand once more.
  Minister was currently rolling on the grass in laughter.  "Just kiss it already FlutterBait!"
  Tooty flew next to Steve to get Cass to protect him from the siblings doubting slaps at the picture ( and Steve).  "Stop, you're going to hurt it Madison!"
  Madison, still doubtful, but know very curious what was going to happen next pointed at the gate on the side of the yard.  "Well, if this magic Fairy is going to help us find all grandpa's old coins, we better go now, or we won't get back before dad gets home."
  Cass looked at Tooty in gratitude and patted the shoulder now covered in an olive green fleece.  "You can sit here if it's easier Fairy."  Tooty flew around the child to show it that she could indeed keep up with the human.  Steve decided it wouldn't be a bad thing for one of them to stick to the child just in case, and made himself comfortable on Cass's shoulder.   BrewMinister was hoping around as a bright orange fox.  "Oh this will be interesting!"

  As they jogged down the road toward a large patch of cornfield, Steve could hear Madison conferring with Cass in somber tones.
  Madison answered.  "I promise I wouldn't lie about this.  I want Dad to be able to pay Mom's medical bills, and Grandpa would have wanted us to dig it all up."
  Before they all got separated in the tall corn, Steve heard both children agreeing, "Mom would want us too." ,and "I miss her so much."   

Fartmoodles: Chapter 10

How to Capture a Fartmoodle
Chapter 10:
"How to mount a turtle"
Edit 1
By: Nellie Tobey


There Gremlins did not have a portal in the suburbs of the town, so travel needed to be made through the closest portal.   It was still a great distance for a Gremlin, and two Pixies to make in a day, so preparations had to be made.

  If Steve had visited the area before, he could zip and whoosh himself and Tooty there, but BrewMinister informed him that even if FlutterBait could manage it,  that particular method of Pixie travel was not compatible with Gremlin magics.

*** At some point BrewMinister had tried this out in the old country with a certain regal Pixie, but upon 'popping' into the designated destination, was over-come with such dizziness, that the Gremlin could not maintain a form long enough to travel any further than a few feet from where they arrived. Anything with a cervical spinal curve made BrewMinister nauseous and that happened to be every creature that the Gremlin knew how to form. ***

After denying the Owlets again the chance to join on the mission, the troupe of three headed out before dawn.  BrewMinister had led them through the portal to a wide fast river that could flow downstream to the town below.  Steve eyed the water nervously.  "How are we going to get there again?"
  Tooty was staring upstream watching for their rides.  "Turtles Steve, they aren't that scary!"
  BrewMinister patted Steve on the shoulder.  "These aren't the snapping kind like where you come from.  These reptiles are friendly."
  "I think I see them Minister, "  Tooty backed away from the sandy bank that spilled into the otherwise inaccessible river.  On either side of the bank were sharp cliffs of dirt and tree roots, where time had eroded away the soil.  It looked as if much of this fast river might have the same trim along the waters edge.
  Steve slowly stepped behind their Gremlin guide.  "I'll just see how you two do it."   Minister let out a slight giggle, and walked up to greet the two turtles who plowed their way into the sand with the large paddle appendages.  The two heads raised up to greet BrewMinister, and the Gremlin bowed to them.
  "First things first Pixies,  these turtles need you to promise there will be no Pixie magics used on the journey downstream."   Tooty looked curiously at Minister, and Steve was still slightly frozen in his place.  "You see, the wildlife here only knows our magic, and they don't want to be ....",  Minister conferred in silent gazes with the turtles for a moment,  "startled by any unexpected events."
  Tooty bowed to both turtles, and gave her belly salute to signify her promise.  Steve stepped forward finally and did the same.  He gulped saying, "On our honor."

***  The turtles at this point, had never really sensed fear from the gremlins, and were quite confused as to why such a magical being would be frightened.  They discussed it much on the journey downstream, and came to the conclusion that perhaps the nervous one was afraid of offending BrewMinister.  The Gremlin had been known to scare a bear away from a fresh salmon if there was sufficient cause. ***

  "Wait..."   Steve watched BrewMinister guide Tooty into the right way to sit balanced on the rounded shell of one of the turtles.  "There's only two?"
  BrewMinister made a gesture toward Steve, and Steve could swear the two turtles were laughing, or at least smiling at him.  "Tooty can ride on her own FlutterBait, you will ride with me."  Steve wanted to be slighted, but was also very grateful.
  Minister helped Steve slide up toward the head of the shell.  It wasn't near as slippery as he first imagined.  BrewMinister changed into medium sized water snake, and wrapped around Steve to keep him in place.  "I think maybe we should be making sure Tooty is safer first..."  Minister held up the snake head and thisped out, "Tooty is unafraid, and on the river, fear is what is most dangerous FlutterBait."
  Tooty pondered this, as her turtle used those strong flippers to make it's way back into the water.  Steve shivered a bit from the feeling of BrewMinister coiling tightly around his legs as their turtle heaved into the water to follow her.
  At first the water was lazy, and did not move very quickly.  Steve imagined it would have been faster to walk, or to carry Minister between them to the town.
"This isn't so bad,"  Steve looked over at Tooty who was actually lounging on the back of her turtle.  BrewMinister tasted the air, and shouted over to Tooty.  "The fast part is coming YoungOwl,  you'll need to sit properly for this part!"
  Steve felt the coils wrap again around him.  "Fast part?"   Steve watched Tooty bracing herself on all fours, and tuck her wings tightly to her back.
  BrewMinister toggled the snake head toward Steve.  "I hear your quite skilled at kiss the frog..."  Steve blushed a bit, "Think of this as hugging the turtle."
  "That is in NO WAY helpful Minister!"
  All that came from BrewMinister was a loud stuttering : "hizzz, hizzz, hzzz"

*********************
  Tooty had managed to ride the turtle quite gently, Minister had translated to her when they arrived, and was welcome to ride whenever she needed.  The turtle Steve rode was shaking it's head vigorously, mouth full of his foot. Steve spittering and sputtering water.
  It hadn't been far into the weaving and bobbing of the water, before Steve had paniced and opened his wings.  The air swept himself up and out of BrewMinisters grasp. The turtles had to bridge so that the Gremlin could climb up with Tooty.  Steve's ride then dove upstream to fetch Steve, and carried him gripped in it's mouth the rest of the way down river.
  BrewMinister smacked Steve on his sides a few times to help cough up some water.  "You FlutterBait, I have no idea how you managed to win with the Frog."
  Tooty wanted to ask, but seeing the misery Steve was in, walked over to help dry some of the water from his wings.  "Is it far to the human house now?"        
   Steve realized that they had arrived a bit later into the outskirts of the small span of houses than planned.  The sun had already been up for a fourth of the daytime.  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ... "  Tooty was gently using a swath of hankerchief to wipe his wings.  She blushed when he looked back at her.
  The turtles blinked at BrewMinister, then at the two Pixies, and made their way back into the water.
   "It's ok Pixie, I've been told you don't have these fast rivers where you are from."  Tooty cocked her head sideways at this.
   BrewMinister, now back in the green toadish form, winked very heavily at her.
   "No, we really don't."  Steve opened a pocket in the skirt in horror.  "My notebook!"  A shadow fell over him, almost visible to the other two.  "I'll have to start all over...."
    The still fishscale clad Gremlin, now done with the delays already thrust upon the mission, grabbed Steve by the arm and pulled him up onto his feet.  "We can give you all your answers about Gremlins again when we are done with this."
 
*** At this point there was a much agreed consensus among the Gremlins that the notebook should be somehow altered, as Steve had come to some awkward conclusions that they were not to happy to share with the other tiny folk.  One being that the process of urination produced the special brew, which they discovered was a bodily function none of them possessed in the way Steve had described.  The Owlets had become very adept at sneaking in to look at the notebook while FlutterBait slept. ***

They approached the grey two story house on the end of the road marked, 'Stout Ave'.   The children were in the fenced back yard as the adventuring scouts had reported.  The little clan of three slipped in through the gap at the gates hinges.
The two children, both with shoulder length hair, t-shirts, and jeans were swinging each other on a tire roped to a large Maple branch.
  Steve sighed in disappointment.  "How do we tell which one is a girl human?"
  BrewMinister huffed.  "What is it with you flying folks, why does it matter?"
  Tooty sensed some tension coming from Ministers now feathery ferret form.
  "Well the picture has a child with a frilly pink dress and a giant bow,  in most of our observations that's a female human."  Steve started to consider he may be treding on unstable ground.
   "What Steve means, Minister, is that in our area they are easily told apart from one another, and given the picture we had of that fairy thing, it would likely be a female that would want to hold on to me."
  BrewMinister still had a grim look, but then darted toward the children.   "So what does it mean when they look like this?"
  Steve considered before answering. "Well in that form, we can't really say.  They all sound and look alike at that age, unless they wear specific cloths."
  The Gremlin put short little arms up in the air in frustration.  "How very observant!"
  Tooty listened to the darker haired child, tell the other "I am done pushin'.  It's my turn to swing!"
  The lighter haired child held tighter to the rope suspending the noxious smelling rubber, and gave the other a big pouty smile.  "One more time, please?"
  Darker haired child got a mischievous twinkle in it's eyes and grabbed the rope above the lighter haired child's hands.  "I'm gonna twirl you till you fall off!" And the tire began swinging wildly with the lighter haired child giggled uncontrollably.
  Minister watched the lighter haired child grow a funny look, and it started yelling, "Ok!  Ok!  Stopppp!!!!"
  With that the darker haired child jerked the tire to a stop, and lighter child fell out onto the dirt.  At first the child whimpered and then it got up, and stomped away.
  BrewMinister nodded satisfactory and pointed.  "We should start with that one.  We can try the other one if this one proves incapable."
  Steve contemplated but then said nothing but, "Ok."
  Tooty flew over to the child, now digging it's feet into the ground to push itself around in the swing.  "HEY, LOOK AT ME!"
  The child slowed a bit, but didn't seem to acknowledge Tooty's presence.  She tried again.  "CHILD!  HERE I AM!!!"
  The child slowed some more, but only stared at the entrance to the house where it's sibling had exited.
  Tooty waved to Steve to fly up next to her to discuss what they should do.  "It's not working Steve....  They just ignore me... They aren't like the adults."
  Steve went to pull out his notebook, but remembered it was gone.  A dark blue glow came over him.  The child gasped, waving its hand in front of it, not far from where Steve hovered in the air.  Tooty realized what was happening.  "Steve, you need to make me glow."
   Steve took a deep breath and spouted, "Tooty, you couldn't make a cow fart on a windy day!"
   Tooty smiled, and started to laugh. "Was that supposed to make me angry? I don't like all that stink remember?"
   Steve remembered the day in the supermarket.  "You've been amazing me since the day I started teaching you our ways, and I don't ever want to stop being there to see your succeed."
   Tooty almost fell out of the air from forgetting to flap her wings.  A slow ultra violet glow started to come from her.  "Really?"
   Steve nodded and watched the child start to focus on Tooty. "Your make every day worth fighting for."
   Tooty's hair illuminated a bright green,  her skin speckled with bright purple specks, and the child's hand leaped forward and snatched her from in front of Steve.

*********************

Steve landed next to BrewMinister and followed the child as it carried Tooty into the house.  She could easily vanish and slip from it's grasp, but she was too busy avoiding looking at Steve.

  Steve grabbed Minister's attention.  "How did you know that was the one we needed?"
  Minister grunted.  "From what you have described to me,  your definition of female just needs to be brave, adventurous, and terrifying."  Steve closed his mouth tight, Minister slipped one last thing in before they jumped in through the open door.  "And who says I picked that one because I thought it a female?"