Tuesday, September 17, 2013

mammon

Wrote a whole rant about money, and work, and people not understanding the difficulties of being an 'only' parent.
Deleted it all.   Just needed to vent.  The wind doesn't care what it blows against, it just blows.  
Just gotta make it through 11 more days of work before I get a day off.  
Hopefully they can work out the well issues with my house so it can be sold in the next couple weeks,  and then I can just relax.   Just get into the swing, and relax.   Kinda wore  out with being wound up tighter then a eunich's butthole.   It's like my brain is this muscle that's constantly tensed up.  I can't even sleep without dreaming about my worries.   Wake up after six hours just cause I'm tierd of dreaming about the shit, i'm trying to sleep and get away from. 


BAH!   I hate just bitching, but my blog is here, might as well use it.   Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice.  My job there was dead end, shop won't last much longer, so I would of had to move on soon anyways. 

At least the dog wants to play.  This fluff face just wants love.  Know the feeling buddy.  Lets throw your dumb stuffed duck around.  Tear it up Tonka.  I would do that too if it wouldn't look crazy.  Throw shit, run and get it, shake the hell out of it, throw it again.   Dog's have it rough.  But I couldn't live without them.  Remider why life is good.  Enjoy the little stuff, roll on the carpet, sniff the roses, bug your human till they give you love.  Cause you know they'll pet you eventually.  Hey~ maybe that'll work on my boyfriend......  tee hee.

Gotta get the kid into the bathtub.  

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Moving up

I'm a factory rat.  That's what my boyfriend calls it.  Shame on him. In a year I'll be making more money then him.  He's been driving for that company for 17 years ( I think)    Glad I'm away from the old job, moved into a rental, sold my house...
Still haven't decided if all the money is worth the time away from home, and my son.  Haven't got to really enjoy it yet.  Waiting for my old house to sell, so making double bills at the moment.
Definitely good to be away from the other place.  I would have ended up quitting or getting fired because of how miserable it was there.   But I'm scared to death to lose this job and be homeless, bankrupt, all that jazz.  I just keep telling myself, 60 days and the fear will go away.  Then I'll be passed my probationary period, be full on union. 

Still....  worry worry.  Read through some of my stuff.   I still really like my story idea about the cyber-work force.   Kinda just adding to material in my head for now.  Hopefully I'll have the enthusiasm to start writing again.   If there was more in it then blowing smoke up my own ass....  Eh.
Picking my kid up from kidnegarden.   He really had a rough day yesterday (first day!), promised I'd pick him up instead of riding the bus for an hour.

My boyfriend says I spoil him too much.   But I prefer to see it as soothing both of us through a rough patch.  He feels better, he's happier, mama's happier.  We can't be perfect parents.  And if this little indulgence is so horrible then I guess I'll live with that.   Spoiled or not, he's my boy and he's gonna know his mom loves him and will try to make his day better.  Kinda what we're supposed to do right?

See all you readers soon.  Still no comments from anyone....  wondering if all the readers are accidental clicks.